Yes, it's true. 4 fingers.
She swallowed my jizz and then took a shot of jack daniels and said "chaser." This cant be real life.
he's doing fine. just headbutted the wall and threw up
I had a dream she was puking on me, but sadly in real life she was puking on me too
he just texted me saying he needs a place to stay for the night. pretty sure i just got booty called to my own house...
wanna tell me why theres a glass of water stuffed with tamptons in the freezer?
Dave used his AAA card to get my car towed to my house so I could get drunk. Evil genius.
Seriously. All i can say is im covered in mud, my jaw hurts, i cannot straighten my arm, egg is everywhere, and there is a dead squirrel.
Bro that's the last time I try to stick my penis in a bowl of jello. I can't believe your sister ate that, did she not see my dick mold
was I really that bad?
you army crawled across the kitchen floor, turned the cat into "super kitty" and crawled into the dog cage
I'm gonna face reality, tomorrow morning is not on my hungover agenda.
Why are there so many fucking Lambchop puppets hidden around my house?!
He dated a girl who could do the damn splits on his dick like how do you compete with that
CAPS.LOCK.AND.SPACEBAR.ARE.BROKEN.
If you're doing something that makes your best friend lock you in a bathroom you shouldn't be doing it
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