he said he didn't have a condom.
and you said?
that that's fine cause i was ready to be a mom. yeah - he magically had a condom he forgot about after that.
Look at the bright side...I have an 11 inch penis
Wat the fuck dude ketchup in my bong???
Im walking to an ob gyn practice session right now. Literally have to get face first in a middleaged vagina in 10 min.
It is. We should just be drunk all the time forever everything is like just 90% more perfect
foreskin is a definite game changer
I imagine I kinda look like a banana with one boob out.
I don't know. Something about answering "what did you do on Sunday?" Seems odd when the reply is, painted, went to the grocery store, put a restraint device on my bed.
I swear I can feel something in my uterus. Like, I can feel his sperm searching for an egg. Wtf...
Never thought I'd say this but the maple syrup flavored vodka probably wasn't our best idea
she asked me to come back to her house where "hopefully her kids were asleep". that my friend is what i call a dealbreaker
I think my AA sponsor just booty called me.
yeah that bottle of rum is only the second thing I want that kid to be pulling out of his pants
I told her to to let go of her rationtal thoughts and just enjoy the fact that i was going down on her till she passed out from sheer orgasmic pleasure.
conclusion: canadians have really freaky sex
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