..Thats also how I think I got the lyrics from MIAs Paper Planes Sharpeed on my ass? Maybe.
How long after st. Patrick's day is it ok to shit green before I should seek medicial attention?
if im not pregnant im gonna be so pissed for spending the money from my weed fund on the test
wow, a mother in the making
he busted in while i was showering looked at me and said "youve lost weight bro, no homo" and started puking into the sink
Sometimes I seriously wonder if I could get away with vodka Sundays at work. Cuz this red bull feels naked.
test run with donkey pinata disastrous. broken glass and tequila EVERYWHERE
just lying in bed drinking beer with a straw waiting for motivation. why?
What a great world we live in when USPS can tell you that your drugs have been delivered.
since when did our medecine drawer and our sex drawer become the same drawer? we now have lube covered cough drops.
Yeah her jello shots are the next closest thing to a lethal injection. That potent.
I wish on days I started my period Chipotle would come to my house with a burrito bar ... Then give me a chocolate cake and a large beer.
I need someone to play with my boobs. Even platonically. I just need a good groping
2 six inch heels, 3 big sangrias, no broken legs
It's not too terrible. You just got a little naked and broke your arm.
kick those bitches in the teeth and tell them mama came to party
Randomize