also referred to as T.P.S. (Toddler Penis Syndrome)
You dropped me off at the wrong girl's house.
There's no such thing as a "wrong girl" make it happen.
alright see you in the morning.
you were licking his little sister's watercolors and trying to paint with your tongue.
went to library to start paper due tomorrow & took those orange addys u gave. now realizing they were ur xanax. completely fucked and going to fail, but calmly at peace with the situation.
I don't think so, think I've only met him once, the night I lost my teeth
I know I said I was done dating 22 year olds but it's not my fault all the guys my age gave up on life and got fat
Bring my lunch to work in liquor store bags is doing nothing for my career
When the question of, do you know who's ass has been on the cake you are eating is said... Good or bad party?
You kept mumbling that you could become one with the carpet as you proceeded to give yourself the worst carpet burn I have ever seen
Does he cat effect his dick pics to you? Because THAT is true love
Dude, chad is laying across the room, violently, passionately, pornographicly eating something and I seriously think the 'some thing' is fighting back.
I believe you would have been proud of me last night.. I was chasin Fireball shots with Jack and Coke. Guess there's a reason they call me Whiskey Woman.
His name is Angel. I'm pretty sure he was sent from heaven solely to eat me out.
I wish I was taller so I could give these boobs the publicity they deserve.
Yep, you're going to hell.
I take on this great possibility with a beer in one hand and the girl I'm gonna fuck later in the other
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