You took my girl thats shot the Fuck out. You better watch your skinny ass.
That's barely a sentence. Who's your girl? I think you've got the wrong number. I haven't even lived in Alabama for 4 years.
Yeah, I do, I'm sorry. I meant 205 not 256. sorry about that.
Good luck with your revenge in Birmingham.
I just punched cris angel in the balls. I have photos.
You were running around the house covered in syrup, with shredded down pillow feathers on your body screaming "AFLACK!" at everyone
there was a guy who was being paid to stand outside of Abercrombie without a shirt on... normally i would be okay with this but he was 40...
Turned out not to be so bad. He had a big dick and i owed him for all the free beer over the year.
I tipped the hot bartender my entire wallet. Again.
It's a lost cause. Soon she's gonna get naked, just let nature run its course
FYI: Brian said he left me in the bathroom Friday night to shower and 45 minutes later found me with a towel around my head, my pants on and holding my boobs. No more Jell-O shots for me.
We joked about how funny it would be if he got pulled over with 300 breakfast burritos in hus car. We walk outside of the school just as the police lights turn on and pull him over
He's slurring his text. I didn't think that was possible.
at first i said "no rollerblading if I'm going to be drunk," but we all know how that went
"This is Emily. She likes potatoes. And sometimes laughs and cries at the same time, and has a wonderful butt"
Also I'd apologize for texting you flipping my shit about the science of hair growth while I was shrooming last night but we know each other better than that
I was so drunk I got stuck in the middle of a revolving door
How high do u want to get? Just kind of high or yelling at swans high...
Swans
Randomize