He thanked me for being "his little blond pogo stick last night". Good thing?
i got a blow job in the bathroom during intermission at the hockey game. i'm pretty sure i made Canada proud.
He panicked, you ducked and I was coming off a 3 day coke binge. It was no one's shining moment.
she gave me her number. found out it was already stored in my phone as "bathroom blowjob"
He said he only likes girls with a sense of humor, after he took his pants off I understood why
College has taught me that the "best idea" is rarely the fun one.
This is true but you can't really get fired from college
Ur dog was like a damn middle school chaperone this morning trying to lay between us after what he saw us do last night
I FOUND THE NORMAL CONDOMS. THIS IS GOD TELLING ME TO CHASE AFTER MY DREAM.
Embrace your curves. Cuz we're too poor for a coke habit.
This guy is clearly nuts his idea of a hangover cure is a six pack poured into a camelpack then hiking 3 miles with a weighted vest. He said "learned it in the army i guess drink beer beat the heat"
When he pulled it out last night I asked if that was as hard as it was going to get. I think I may have offended him.
I pulled up iMessage on my computer and I'm pretty sure two people in my class saw that dick pic you sent. Sorry!
Tony's mom to him at breakfast: "I found the shirt you wore last night in the bushes this morning."
Yay I only have ONE giant mystery bruise from yesterday
OMG OMG OMG!!!! I made his penis bleed!! I repeat I MADE HIS PENIS BLEED!!!!
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