come over anyways, right now, right this second
it can be a super quick quicky, then you can go back to studying
wow, that sounds SO fun, please stop enticing me with premature ejaculation
I want you to know that after i type the word "your" vagina is next on my predictive tex
whats a positive sounding word for "exploit"?
Thats two for two birthdays where I've gotten the "alcoholism runs in the family" speech
gross. I think i'll just donate all my eggs. My children will be incredible, but they're not welcome in my womb
I'm bleeding from my lower lip, and I have bruises around my neck. It was just easier to say I got mugged.
Make sure to show her the sewer we were arrested in on your tour.
If after tonight I can still walk on my own, take me to another bar.
I'd like to thank you fucktards for dumping the WHOLE box of Tricuits in my bed after I passed out.
Also I fell in love w a girl dressed as a pirate that was great at doing the limbo
He said he was walking down to the White Castle for sliders, still drinking straight from a 750. He came back two hours later pushing a grocery cart that had two puppies in it.
The puppies promptly had the squirts all over the living room, as he had fed them the sliders.
I suppose what I've learned from this experience is that sometimes you just have to make out with a narcissistic baby daddy to make a clean getaway.
hell or highwater he WILL get a blowjob in the hammock before the end of summer.
He claimed he was the best ass eater of the south. He was right.
Thank you for dog sitting, there is $60 on my desk to be spent on DRUGS AND/OR GAS ONLY not that food stuff people crave.
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