just tell him he has love handles, he'll die of insecurity
Is it wrong to scream your own name when about to bust?
At an apparent methhead hillbilly bar and was smiling for a pic when one toothless wonder screamed "look at all them teeth"!
i just fell asleep at my computer and i woke up and in the google bar it said delicious foods to eat
If my bosses could see, smell or hear me right now they would understand why its a horrible idea to keep the office open sundays
I kno. She bruised her chin trying to swim thru the hardwood floor.
Is it wrong that I want to take the baby bump in her facebook pictures as "meal-ticket"?
It's time for everyone's favorite Wednesday night game... WHEEL OF. VODKA!!!!!
I rolled joints beforehand. Lit a candle. Ghetto rigged taping the 40's on my hands and then lit the joint using the flame of the candle.
I'm so proud of your modern ingenuity
Sorry about coming to the pool in only a thong. I thought you said it was closed. Not that you were teaching a group of kids how to swim.
just chugging fertility tea and vodka, no big deal.
WE'RE MOVING TO IRELAND!!!! DON'T ASK QUESTIONS JUST BOOK THE DAMN FLIGHT!!!!
I think I sent pictures of my boobs to an Olympic athlete...
I woke up in the bathroom clutching a stuffed shark. My night was fantastic, thanks for asking.
I'm sorry I get my lefts and rights confused because I'm dyslexic. But, it took you at least 15 minutes to figure out it wasn't your room OR YOUR HUSBAND.
Randomize