I'm fascinated by her cleavage. She has deep cleavage, but no obvious boobage to speak of. Check it out.
I woke up covered in BBQ sauce. My hand had "you win" written on it. Do I celebrate?
just taught 3 girls from korea how to fist pump on chat roulette.
dude. how can brian from family drink at fucking bars? he's a dog and definitaly doesn't have pockets.
if they reproduce, their children will be the worst quarters players ever
It wasn't until that morning that I realized I wasn't actually dreaming, finding myself in the bathtub with someone laying on me
we are currently watching a singalong porn...just thought you should know
so i say "rick dont build that sandcastle" and he "says ok i wont" then i wake up and its sandcastle fucking city all over my apartment
Sitting on the curb by new england comics with a weeping drunk girl who's eating french fries saying she'll never be as successful as her sister the hand model. She's scaring the nerds.
It's like getting ready for my vaginas own execution
So I'm thinking next semester you should be my own personal maid, nurse, masseuse and chef in exchange for free lodging, any food you can find, and unlimited access to my reproductive organs.
He hasn't responded, but he probably just jizzed in his shorts again, so I'll give him time.
I just want to make out with him forever
If one more person says Merry Christmas to me I’m going to take a pen out of my pocketbook and stab them in the eye
She said cowgirls can can pee standing up and proceeded to pull up her dress and drop her underwear.
Randomize