the best thing about dollar beer night is beer is only a dollar.
how lazy do you have to be to be a fat vegetarian?
you kept say ridiculous things then repeating them in perfect classical latin. You are onee intelligent drunk
Just got cockblocked by coyotes. This would happen to me.
I still don't understand how I went from crying to blowing you in like two minutes.
I just noticed my teeth are no longer straight. Wondering if anyone had an explanation.
Watching her eat just hurts me
he gifted me a vibrator as he was breaking up with me. you tell me how my night went
Mixing coffee with vodka may have been a bad choice, I feel like I'm pregnant and the baby is trying to perform a c-section from the inside.
Yeah then you killed that bottle of Bacardi in under 20 minutes. So much for being an organ donor.
I think my fortune cookie is telling me I give good blowjobs.
BUT DID YOU RIDE THAT DICK INTO THE SUNSET THO?
I may be a complete scumbag but even im not willing to spend a grand and sit on a plane for 24 hours just for shrooms and a blowjob
There's hope in those eyes, for a better tomorrow or more cocaine, we may never know, but there's hope.
Please come pick up your twin. She's tap dancing in her underwear and that's not how you want yourself represented.
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