Am I allowed to make my facebook status "loves farting in chairs"? I think it would shock every boy that I am friends with.
All I wanted was a "this is what America feels like" blowjob before I left. Is that too much to ask for?
i can now proudly say that ive peed off of a balcony overlooking the pacific ocean AND a balcony overlooking the atlantic ocean
I've done nothing but whore my gay ex bf out for the past 48 hours. It's getting weird.
It was one of those you-have-no-other-way-home-and-we-already-made-out-so-I-guess-youre-coming-home-with-me-if-you-promise-to-leave-early kind of deals.
And then he posed under the bed and said, "you should draw me like one of your french girls." Why do they keep giving this kid drugs?
No no no he wouldn't talk to me before I showed his best friend how good I am at twerking
Running my fingers through my hair is like that scene from Patch Adams where the girl goes swimming in a pool of spaghetti. I love molly.
Did body shots with a guy... Ended up being the ref of my volleyball game... So that's why we won
I need a life alert for his random dick pics. My heart can't handle that.
I am googling "notable people who had syphilis"
Let's celebrate our freedom by getting high and doing stupid shit.
Yes. Life would be much easier if we had penises & could do whatever the fuck we want.
I mean you can one up her. Instead of ruining friendships you can ruin marriages.
BOOM BITCH SERVES YOU RIGHT I HOPE YOU SHIT YOURSELF PETER PAN
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