Hello rock bottom. My name is Jared. Nice to meet you.
which gay bar do you need a ride home from?
I have sucked so much dick this week I think I am going to start sweating semen
sex in a ball pit. and I thought ghandi did great things.
Alright I don't know how you'll link it to me but yes I left a nearly empty 12 pack on your trunk
there are ass prints on the hood of my car.
not much just sitting outside his bathroom door naked eating cheetoes. You?
I'm pretty sure every guy I've been with this weekend has made a solid attempt at getting me pregnant...
I bought an american flag today and by god im gonna fuck someone on it
Jsyk, in serious talks of trading blowjobs for soup in bed. I'm sober
Word of advice, don't put your jar if peanut butter in the microwave, blue fire comes out
I will refer to it as the penis of glory... he fucked me for 3 and a half hours - and all he needed was a 5 minute power nap in the middle (which he took WHILE INSIDE ME). I plan on staying with him forever
Nothing wrong with a few meaningless hookups. Keeps the mind occupied and the body satisfied
You told everyone to shut up then told the officer that you are 21 when you drink.
Btw, apparently no one knows who ordered the pizzas for the after party, no one paid, and the delivery lady made a celeb shot, took a beer, then said she'd be back later to finish up the game...
I just sharted for the first time in my life. Age 33. Lying in bed. Sober. 2021 is off to a great start!
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