By the end of the second bowl I was making sound effects to every hand movement he made.
How you know a guy is gay: they say they would want money, not sexual favors, from emma watson
Question: Is it too early to claim April Fools on the text "can we do some lines before the concert" that I accidentally sent Mom?
Literally passed out while tubing... Boating while hammered is a blast but thank God for life jackets
He passed out. Woke up long enough to declare himself "the sauce boss" and then bit me in the face.
You flooded my bathroom while trying to construct a hot tub. All three of you were completely naked.
nope, if she's going to skank it up with ginge-a-saurus douche she deserves the silent treatment.
You should not be allowed to go away on the weekends I plan on getting drunk on. I need someone to stop me from punching this guy in the face. It's simple room mate etiquette.
Best orgasm I ever had! I though we totally connected and I asked him to stay over. He went back to the sigma chi house and returned with his blankie and a 40. please help
Yeah he told me he wanted a serious relationship, but he's posting pictures of his dick on Kik.
Dude mama brought home the bacon, i got his HBO account i guess that makes up for his by par skills in bed.
On a scale of 1 to shit show you were "i just pissed myself"
He's here walking around DRUNK AS FUCK in a Kobe Bryant number 8 jersey... Tucked in.
And I’m prepared, because I'm in it to win it (and by win I mean get railed hard)
His sex game is strong it’s like a warlord’s dick! you know what I mean?
Nope
Randomize
