ur plase or mine? lol
well if you don't learn how to spell, you may be at your place and I'll be at mine.
I'm at a party with that guy you made out with on new years. He remembers your name!
His shirt was in the kitchen sink this morning, I'm pretty sure my roommates know.
Peter invited his little brother to smoke with us and he is trying so hard to pretend he's done it before. When he saw the weed he was like "hell yeah!" and everyone got completely silent and just looked at him
I already apologized. And I got cum in my eye in return, I say your night beats mine...
Yes. Yes. Double yes. I'll bring the tits. You bring the frosting.
You got pulled on stage by a stripper who wore ruffled ankle socks and did jumping jacks for her dance. Then you were put in a chokehold by a security guard that almost cried because you supposedly said "fuck you!" to him.
I stirred my drink with a butcher knife. His roomate keeps giving me dirty looks
Like what do you want from me
You don't feed me, fuck me, or fulfill me.
Will u lay on an air mattress with me and drink vodka while we listen to Rick James?
You’ll lick BBQ off my cock but no ketchup on a hotdog?
Video on mandys page of you drinking upside down was finally put up...too bad all the comments were about me and him fighting in the background while he screamed "BLOW BIG BETSY!'
Nothing like an afternoon walk of shame across campus on parent's weekend. Damn.
Your dick. My mouth. We have 20 minutes.
If he knew how badly I want to blow him he’d stop talking about his wife
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