does wine, beer, and vodka mix well??
dude, everything can mix, this is college.
I just saw the Donald Trump of homeless quys walking down the street. He had three shopping carts and a bike.
Eric and I got kicked off of karaoke last night. Apparently, singing about masturbation to the tune of "A Whole New World" is not appropriate and definitely frowned upon by the DJ.
Some girl, somewhere, is going to wake up with my face paint on her vagina
Absolute soulmates or functional alcoholics?
Can't be the first without the last
Okay. But I hope it isn't expensive lingerie. Because I'm ripping it off Hulk Hogan style.
Just left the frat house in last nights clothes minus my earings, shoes, underware, tequilla cap, and my dignity. If you see me on your way home just hit me
he knocked a glass of water onto my bed and then said that he should get to sleep on the dry side because he was "a guest"
Apparently I still called the officer "sir" despite the fact I was at a .21 BAC. Southern girls are raised right
Why can't burritos get me drunk
So i stood up out of the sunroof while he gave me oral. Car was still moving. Exactly how illegal is that?
That makes sense.. A good Bj is a trump card in any argument
This ice cream is 10x better than the sex I had yesterday
A guy who takes a plate of chicken tenders away from us is not to be trusted or slept with
Why is there bacon in the couch?
Randomize
