Its ok relax. i can tell ur gonna start raggin. talk 2 u next week
Someone took a freaking dump on a roll of toilet paper. Next to the toilet. No shit in the toilet. Just on the roll of toilet paper.
I just googled "whats above a trillion", thats how busy I am at work.
okay I'm thinking he doens't have a facebook...I'm on page 28 of Hunters
ok you need to stop NOW
I don't know what's more pathetic, the fact that you dated him or the fact that it took a Taylor Swift song for you to break up with him.
Cleveland boys shit in their own pumpkins in their own living room. Got pictures to prove it.
Grandma was not a fan of the beer-can ornaments. Not "traditional".
I just used my med student white coat as ID to buy beer at 9 in the morning
He fell and asked for a beer and a band-aid.
HE GOT FOURTEEN STICHES
I guess at this point I should stop judging guys on their looks and more on their major and trust fund. Growing up sucks.
I complimented him on his choice of carpeting while he was humping me.
Drunk Jeff aka Dreff thinks he's about 3x cooler than be really is and about 100x better at dancing than he really is
My liver needs me to go back to work asap.
I made him laugh his dick is mine
last final went out with a bang.. 20 min late bra-less, cum in my hair and i still cant find my shoes.
Randomize
