why didn't you poke me back
Sometimes, dog treats look like people treats.
My cousin's wedding had personal beer funnels for each table and a drinking game against the bride and groom. im sorry for ever calling you white trash
bro...we were banging on her floor and her dog walked in and started licking my balls
she had a pic of herself in a bikini as the wallpaper on her iPhone... I'm sensing a Tyra banks kinda girl. shit.
i wiped a booger on my final. end of semester present.
I need Christmas break to be over. I'm tired of fucking my old High School girlfriends
Well he's in a two year college so technically hes a senior. At least can we just pretend I'm not robbing the cradle.
We just saw him running from campus police a few minutes ago. So no, I don't think he's still passed out on the quad.
Did you really just use your nipple as a unit of measurement?
I can't believe you're trying to guilt me into a blow j because a tornado made you homeless.
Is it working?
Whatever you gave me is making me lactate
So I come back home and a huge flock of enormous vultures are on my roof
They're waiting for you to die
Yo. What's your name again? You put "don't tell your landlord" as your name lol
Amazon is not showing any promising results for penis tree toppers and I am genuinely surprised. Clearly this is a market that needs to be addressed.
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