TBS has betrayed me by telling me tyler perry is funny
I know it may not be fiscally responsible to pregame fifty cent night, but I'm gonna go ahead and do it anyway.
just realized i can abbreviate thomas paine as t pain in poli theory class notes....YES
he stopped making out with me and said "can I make you grilled cheese? I feel like I owe YOU something"
I now have an ENTIRE drawer of unused disposable silverware from Boston Market... and you guys said I needed to "buy" kitchen stuff
Do you think he woke up this morning, looked at you, and then regretted everything?
I think 2012 will be the year I purposely put myself in awkward situations. Much like 2011 but really trying this time. Like fucking the little sister of a girl I already fucked and dating a chick that lives with her ex. It could be awesome or horrible.
He made me write my name on his wall in crayon so he'd be able to remember it in the morning
He got kicked out 3 times. I have no idea how he kept getting back in. I saw him walking on the highway the next morning.
I think I'll handle my grief by throwing myself headlong into lesbianism. Seems like a fitting tribute to you.
My boobs are feeling quite sensitive so I told them, " you is smart, you is kind, you is important" that should do the trick.
You slid down the wall and got into the fetal position. He was definitely judging... I was judging....
I'm over here willing to be the Yoda of fucking but I guess he just doesn't want to be a Jedi.
cmon you know I'm perfectly capable of something that ridiculous 100% sober
I woke up with my my shoes on and pants half way off and missing 60 dollars. Please please please tell me you saw me last night.
Randomize
