she refuses to pay for the plan b and so do i. it's the most dangerous game of chicken i've ever been involved in. but i have my pride.
Had a farmer come into my class to talk to us today. He apparently met his wife on fb and just thanked jesus for his land. I think I am in the wrong major...
Don't think anyone else in the building has a lunchbox full of yay
Hey there's a sandwich in there too!
I mean it's like...I'm sorry I slept with your boyfriend but is it my fault that he failed to mention you when I was giving him head in the Dave and Busters bathroom?
There is so much wrong with that sentence
Yeah there really shouldn't be a bar at D&B's...shit gets real
Friends don't brand friends with cigars. It's not how it works.
I'd just like to formally thank you for the size of your dick. The gods must really love you.
I guess there's no delicate way to say "I'm 90% sure I sucked his dick in the bathroom of the bar."
You was so high that you insisted that you heard someone whistle, then you insisted they was trapped in the wall!
I'm standing up, for my all my brothers and sisters, and fighting against whiskey dick.
So, I without a doubt haven't used the bag I'm now carrying since we were dating. Just had to discreetly throw out an unopened magnum in a bus station.
The problem is that you are trying to hold on to some dignity. Let it go. I hope your rash gets better.
Too stoned. Randomly can't get the image of Emilio estevez's smiling face out of my head. What is life.
Woke up, bank account is empty. Sock is still full of blood. Nothing in my pockets but a wireless mic and jenga pieces.
Omg no hes gotta go down on me. Then itll be like my vagina has kissed the stanley cup.
Remember how I made that resolution to remain celibate for 6 months? Well, I just broke that
You literally made that 4 hours ago...
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