Yea and his cousin visited from central and i fucked her i was texting him at work teasin him about it but sent it to his mom by accident
but i am gonna have to have sex w/ him again to get my earrings back
he was sending me dirty texts but i was watchin nickeloden and couldnt get into it
im ashamed your my cousin
so i decided to listen to you and went ahead and slept with him. you owe me 3 minutes
Unless you watched your mom's very literal rendition of "I touch myself" while she was wearing a bikini, your vacation wasn't as bad as mine.
if by 'bottleservice' you mean 'bringing beers in my purse' then yes, we are.
I just want to do a slip-and-slide into a giant pool of jello shots right now.
Do you know how I hurt my ankle or my shoulder? Or the origin of any of the following mystery bruises: left quad, left wrist, right elbow. Thanks for playing.
I just looked at a girl and was like what disease does she have? And then my mind caught up ohhh shes pregnant.
DICK PUNCH EXTRAVAGANZAAAAAA!!!!!
Why don't you throw your vagina at it and see what happens?
Embrace your curves. Cuz we're too poor for a coke habit.
It's amazing where one well timed dick pic can get you in life.
I'm cooling my balls with a beer because I'm too cheap to turn on the AC
I dunno. The drunker I get, the easier econ gets. I may be onto something here.
Randomize