drink some water, pull the trigger, get a bfast sandwich. Only good things.
he keeps commenting everything on my facebook. it's like he's virtually peeing on me
hes totally cute, too bad i slept with his father
My last google search last night was 'vodka swimming pool'.
My parents just suggested that we tailgate the midnight christmas service. this is my gene pool.
I had to photo shop your nipple piercings. that was extremely awkward.
every single time I see a picture of the two of them on facebook, I want to just call her and scream "your boyfriend said I give the best head on the east coast". But I've been told that would be inappropriate.
"Home for the holidays" isn't clearance to fuck the recently 18 year old high schooler right?
Nope, his last birthday was.
Oh my god i hate key west. No one takes amex and strippers took all my money
I feel like we should build an island for girls that have committed atrocious numbers of unforgivable sins. We'll call it 'whore island' after the anchorman fashion.
Her next conquest seems to be stealing her ex-boyfriend's new girlfriend. Pretty sure everyone involved is totally OK with this.
Aaaand the winner of the worst decision of Sunday night goes to me as I pull up to his house in my lingerie.
For some reason she gave me a handjob. It was all very confusing
My hook-up from last week somehow found me at the club, saw the girl I was trying to fuck, kissed me right in front of her, and walked off.
short story short, i just screamed anal seepage in the middle of a diner.
Randomize
