I'd fuck her but she fucked Dusty. And I'm pretty sure he's humped livestock
Anthony wouldn't know good sex if it sat on his face
My life has hit rock bottom, I'm watching a movie on lifetime about retarded people falling in love. And I'm jealous of their relationship.
you told all the 17 year old girls at the party that your mating call was "I glitter in the sun"
can you explain why there is a dead rabbit in my front seat?
idk, I had a turtle in mine.
5 out of the 6 of them cut their hands while trying to shot gun the beer, I had never seen balls attached to such patheticness
I've started making all these amazing things...like bananas rolled in doritos..bandritos.
I just feel like a little gay dolphin in a massive sea
Then she cat effected the picture of my dick I sent her the other night. I'm in love.
I just caught myself watching and Irish step dance documentary in my underwear drinking nyquil through a straw at 2 in the afternoon. today's off to a good start.
NO HOOKUPS IN THE CAR. I will try as i might to practice what i preach, but there are no guarantees.
Munching saltines, sippin Gatorade, and trying not to get eaten by this small horse
I told myself I'd stop after three shots of fireball. Haha HA hA.
U dont jog and buy condoms n bulk
Good thing he's hot and my vagina likes him or I'd be at Dennys right now.
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