I don't know what I could have possibly done in a past life to deserve watching my boyfriend projectile vomit margaritas and probs blood while completely naked.
Canada is now making docos about life in America. Its called Trailer Park Boys.
I can't wait to get all this Makers out of my shoe.
i like being sick. whatever the doctor gave me is awesone. the walls are waving at me. i never want to get better.
Oh wait looks like my cousin is getting deported THERE'S HOPE FOR THIS CHRISTMAS YET
Math equation of the day: 4 waffles + 1 bowl of weed = 1 terrific nap
We stared down the barrel of pure insanity, took more and the electric elephant god rewarded our fearlessness by giving me golden skulls and naked women crawling out of the walls. I love acid
I'm wearing a cape at the laundromat. I really can't say shit
My penis needs a shock collar
Ok, they now been on the roof for two days. I can see 4 cases of teecate and a carton of smokes. They are yelling at "fucking fall" and pissing off the roof.
I just got a lap dance from a sexy cop in return for giving him his sunglasses back. I think this is going to be the beginning of a really great friendship
All I've done is masturbate and drink while being home from college.
Oh also we fucked while one of the old Rudolph movies was playing on tv so it was festive
Mid thrust, say hold on I need a pic for my friend.
You stocked up?
No actually didn’t get a chance. If you wouldn’t mind bringing me a brownie and a bottle of Jameson that’d be nice
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