Wanna demo a makeout? Check box yes or no. Or maybe. Okay bye.
why didn't we just drop out of school years ago and become dominatrix bitches who beat men?
I don't know but we should still do that
I am now the proud owner of a 10-12 year old's Optimus Prime costume from Walmart. Tomorrow is going to be a good day.
Ok just saw a girl open a pillbox, dump it out on her notebook and count out 13 adderall tabs and put them in a baggie and leave. Oh hey college.
she acted like she'd never seen someone do speed off of a desk with a rolled up receipt. and she calls herself a grad student.
We had a pillow fight. It looks like an angel exploded here. A DRUNK ALCOHOLIC ANGEL
I though us hooking up in the field was your way of saying you were an outdoors person
You should just construct a mini-city, actually. Then destroy, photograph and post. Who could turn down a dick that conquered a whole city? Craigslist personals wont know what hit it.
Made eye contact with his twin sister the day after he gave me a lifechanging blowjob. Do you think she knows?
It's like an adderall Houdini. Right when you think you have a deal he disappears
First day in a very long time I've done more pushups than bong rips
So from zero to dumpster fire, how shitty do you feel this morning? I'm hovering somewhere around trainwreck.
He stopped in the middle of us fucking so he could turn on lithuanian techno music. And the sad thing is that it was the best sex of my life.
At what point did i decide poptarts, nyquil, and whiskey was a good idea?
Do you think Root Touch Up or Just for Men would work better on pubes?
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