Running into every girl no one would hook up with here at rick's. Typical.
dude, she has braces
i meant the dude w the ponytail.
i was less creeped out when i thought you were talking about the 14 y.o.
if he's not good at sex i should be allowed to have sex with someone who is. that's a totally legit statement i think
the bride spent most of the night apologizing to people she had punched earlier.
then my gynecologist said "its like opening up buried treasure"
I never thought to pass out in a hotel lobby rather then paying for a hotel room until you taught me that's acceptable at the Hilton
Dude. The girls called me over to see what they had in their dorm. They snuck in a pigeon in a cardboard box. They named it Quincey. They swear they're sober.
You're a disgrace to the female race and the love triangle and halloween.
Also I walked home in over mitts \nLet's take a minute to really laugh about that
Are the homeless actually allowed to bathe in fountains located on Main Street in downtown Houston? Can Houston TX be so progressive as to condone public bathing?
So I found where you barfed in my house. Just wanted to let you know that my cat barfed on the kitchen floor in a show of solidarity
Why must everything this weekend have to do with something going into or coming out of my vagina?
They think its so cute and admirable that I learned French. BITCH HAVE YOU NEVER HEARD OF GOOGLE TRANSLATE? sexting foreign bitches, there's an app for that
I wish I was there so i could bitch slap his incredibly sexy face
Today is a good day to get high. It's easy to blame the glazed-over look in my eye on my new contacts
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