He told me I remind him of his sister...
Was this before or after you did it?
before... I mean, it's been a long time. I just tried not to think of it during.
Banjos are just sex machines. Like lights to moths, banjos are to hipster bitches.
Sitting in class thinking wow im glad im not hungover...and then i realized im still drunk.
If you liked it then you shoulda put your dick in it, oh uh uh oh
a pansexual with facepaint started fucking a tall black girl on the bed i was sitting on so im going to mcdonalds
remind to leave next time the words "tequila" and "challenge" are shouted
Full contact beer pong was definitely not my best idea.
You kept asking her which dick pills worked the best. She's a grandmother.
You shall now refer to my vagina as patty and patty only
I woke up with a dick pic from the ex-Mormon via email. Not really what I wanted to see before my first cup of coffee this morning, but I gotta say, I'm impressed.
Alvin just won tickets on the radio. I guess he's out of jail.
I don't know where I keep finding these guys, but mi power bottoms es su power bottoms.
I just want a relatively mentally stable guy with tattoos and facial hair that loves Captain America as much as I do and will fuck me the way I deserve to be fucked, is that too much to ask for?
I might need to come puke in your toliet on the way home
I love waking up to reeses ice cream. But I DONT love waking up to it all over my cat. I blame you.
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