dude, she masturbates with a ken doll.
She rolled a blunt with one hand...and instantly I had a boner, I'm going to marry this girl.
Just did lines off a tackle box. Love Montana.
She deep throated me and when I woke up she made me pizza. I was full of emotions I started to cry.
Sorry really high. We have no lighter so we're lighting the bowl with rolled up paper towels lit by candle which also lit with a rolled up paper towel that we lit with the stove eye
One is full of apple juice. One is full of tequila. This is real russian roulette my friend.
His tongue was like Jesus himself was blessing my boobs for eternal ecstasy.
I'm not so sure Jesus approves of such activities, but ok.
What's the procedure for answering a booty call from someone under house arrest?
Because the guy guy doing the drawing either wanted to bone, or wanted us to stop entering the contest. Either way, we got concert tickets so I'm cool with both scenarios.
And tan into my neighbor in the elevator. She was going to the gym. I was covered in mascara and dog hair eating a hash brown
So far I consider it a great summer because I have had to buy Plan B a total of zero times
Dude i'm still drunk and i'm feeding a raccoon cereal from my bedroom window
I hate when pubes grow back. My mons is a warzone.
We were looking everywhere for you and I finally found you in the closet talking to a build a bear.. So I gave you and myself another drink
She's walking down the sidewalk with a notebook, a pencil, and a box of cheez its while yelling profanities at small animals.... I'm going 2 ask her where she was before this.
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