Sign #1 this conference will suck: Ice breaker question, how many proud virgins do we have in the room, overwhelming response. Looks like I'm not getting laid this weekend.
I wish i could make my toaster dance like they do in the second ghostbusters. But i dont have ectoplasmic goo. Or a toaster.
my 12 year old sister just told me how admirable it was that i felt comfortable going out with my friends dressed "like that"
I had to write an apology letter to security guards in the hotel so I didnt get kicked out
Ok but if you die you have to get "I should've listened to Mike" carved into your tombstone
Pretty sure I just convinced a drunk guy at the train station that I was from the future
trapped on the roof of the strip club. help
Cops just came and got two guys out of my class. I can't do college. Seriously cannot rage at this school anymore.
The video of him doing the dougie made me telling him I didn't want a relationship, just his virginity so much easier.
It's a lube slip n slide down the hallway now. Details later.
Hook ups at LEGOLAND don't count right?
Are we playing inappropriate sexual encounters bingo?
We were sexting and i didn't know what to say, so i said i wanted to wrap him in tortillas and devour him like a burrito. then i went on by saying that i liked my burritos with a lot of cheese.
My husband was abducted by a group of disco dancers in the parde and danced off down the street. If you see him, tell him to Hustle on home and clean the cat box. #MardiGras
You've had it in your mouth, how have you not seen it?
How do you confess that you've had phone sex with your fiancé's brother's ex-girlfriend's new guy she's dating who has also slept with your best friend?
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