ok watching intervention on tv. when i hit rock bottom - i wanna be THIS chick.
I'm on the bus going to class. And a cop just rolled by and I got nervous because I didn't have my seatbelt on. I have to stop smoking so much weed.
Yeah he had his two razors labeled "face" and "pubes". Should I be disgusted or impressed?
How many times do I have to drunk reject you for our friendship to become awkward? Cause were at 9 as of last night
also found a pic of my head in the microwave from the other night.. hmm
He was spooning with the dog when I came home. Now shes afriad to go near him. Should I ask?
she's just been through a whole lot lately. When the crazy starts leaking out we give her vodka and lock her in the room with all the pillows.
so that's what that room is for...
things I never thought I would say vol. 24 "Bagpipes just remind me that my relationship is over"
I totally almost forgot you fucked that guy. St. Patty's bar crawls always have a drawback.
In other news, people don't judge you when you buy a vibrator if you buy a funny birthday card and bag with it. I learned that this weekend.
Apparently you can unlock an iPad by doing a line on the lock screen I'm about to bust that myth
I can't have my last hookup before 21 have been behind a dumpster
I met his parents. We played twister. My boob popped out.
It makes my nipple hurt just thinking about it.
had to remind myself that killing him is not a good career move AGAIN.
one of my students asked me today if i was having a baby. fuckin 4 year olds and their lack of filter. time to get back to the gym i guess
Randomize
