I won a flip cup tournbment! Why is boot and rally so hard when youre old?
yup put them legs up on your shoulders and eat her like some folgers
eat her like coffee?
I got to stop making out with my boss at work. I think we should just get it overwith, be dissaponted and move on.
the size of his penis is telling me NOOO! but his bank account is telling me YESSS!
I can't even go pee because I'm making sure he doesn't run off somewhere naked.
thanks for the bloody nose. you probably dont remember, i'm not mad.. only because your boobs are to blame
he fell asleep like an hour after we got to the beach, he deserved that penis shaped sunburn.
I'm still drunk. it's summer. I just need a hot dog and an aspirin.
He never broke character while fucking me on the neighbor's lawn. I give him a 10 for his dedication to the British accent.
There is nothing quite so awkward as watching topless bullriding with your mother next to you..
A homeless man gave him a blanket and an ambulance drove him to sarahs...
I am naked and annoyed.
So we are in the middle of sex and his brother knocks on the door and says "dude I just wanted to know if you want to see the fish I got tonight"
He had a cruise ship of a dick and I need to set sail on that ocean again
As you were leaving you yelled at the owners that the stairs weren't suitable for "intoxacapated" people and promptly fell down them.
So I WAS right.
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