I just woke up in the back of his van. Bring me a sunkist.
i can't believe i haven't brushed my teeth. and i just kissed my grandma. I'm going to hell.
dude my little brother busts into my room last night and yells did you know that grandma is hiding scrambled eggs between her legs
All of our toilets in my house are broken. Thank God I've practiced peeing in the sink enough.
Haha pretty bummed I didn't stay night yesterday after the bj fest you described
do you think she knows her nickname is brickface?
Announcement: Given the sad circumstances regarding the death of my dearest friend Chong the Bong, there will be a brief memorial service for him tomorrow evening at 10:30 at my place. After sharing some memories and sending his spirit off to the great bowl in the sky, we will all take place in the commemoration and maiden voyage of his son, Chong Squared, who eagerly waits to meet all of you. High blessings to you all, piece be with you.
KNEE DEEP IN HOES. SEND HELP.
Me and him getting it in is for special occasions only. Like Christmas and when they bring the McRib back.
So my mind was like YOU ARE TOTALLY GONNA MAKE IT TO CLASS TODAY but then my body was all LOL NO YOU AIN'T.
He thought you were kidding about me peeing on my ex...and then I was like "that was one time"
Is it festive if I masturbate to Santa porn?
alll i remember is comming back downstairs, his pants were off and he was aplauding me
I was looking for a pen and I stumbled upon my mom's vibrator. On a related note, yes I will be going out tonight.
she's always on high-alert for lesbians
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