Mom and Dad are dead. Trust fund
dude chill. it wont be anything like your seventh grade birthday party.
everyone who works at gamestop is basically destined to live with their parents for the rest of their lives... so i said no.
He just refered to Steak and Shake as "a good place for couples". I will definitely not be shacking tonight.
Please stop leaving drunk voicemails with your new black/Irish accent.
Oh damn. God have mercy on everything w a dick in a ten mile radius.
She only spoke Russian, but she was so gorgeous it didn't matter
Oh. I think she ate all the cake and took our vodka...still gorgeous.
Ecstasy body chair massage shower sex fest this week?
I told my doctor about us having twin chlamydia
So hungover. Walked into room and poached their catering before realized in wrong place. Scowled and ate it anyway
No. I either had a 6 minute orgasm or I had so many I lost count. I'm still not sure.
Meeting him up for him to pay half of the Plan B was awkward but worth it cause I'm broke as fuck
you gave me money for the cab and then walked home..
dude. I can hear the air.
You know you're drunk when you have to be picked up out of a bathtub.
Randomize
