At what point did I decide it would be a good idea to fill my contact case with vodka
I introduced him to the male G-Spot. Don't ever tell me I'm not experienced.
My grandpa just complimented my boobs. Im taking this as a compliment but also brushing it off as alcoholism on his part.
The forest. Magic mushrooms. Wind trees leaves sky. That is alll.
He's either jacking off or listening to Kanye West.
Just whatever you do please don't lick his face again.
I world jack off literally anyone now that I'm not related to.
I still can't believe that I ate McDonald's off of my chest in his bed...
Cross faded me is not the classiest.
No not at all haha I wish there was a picture of that
He pulled a bucket of fried chicken out of his backpack as a peace offering. Under the chicken was a rainbow bag of weed. We're dating again.
oh and apparently my boobs are named "have no fear" and "plenty o'beer"
It's like she fell out of an MTV reality show and no one knows how to send her back
Okay, so when I go to meet your grandma, let's do a quick cum check to we don't have another "what's that on your face?" situation.
Jesus fuck. I just hit on him in front of the whole fire department. They hit the sirens and told us to get a room. FML. I can never go back to that fire station again...
All three of the bartenders here have screwed my boss, so he's definitely gay. Unfortunately for you he seems to have a type and you're not it.
You offered him a “Sorry I Blew Your Brother” Blowjob. How does that make it right?
I promised him it would be better than the one I gave his brother which is really nice of me since their actually only half brothers and his brother is cuter
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