is she serious with that outfit? Why doesnt she just paste a for sale sign on her boobs?
you yelled that ur labia majora was swollen at 3 am in the dorm hallway
I'm not sure...it could be the pasta I ate from her sink, the dominoes, or just the alcohol. Or a wicked combination of all 3.
I just don't know what he sees in my vagina...and that scares me.
She's currently celebrating her completion of "Sober October" with "Margarita Shit-Show November."
HOW IS IT EARTHLY POSSIBLE TO DO THAT MUCH DAMAGE WITH JUST MY THUMBS?? HOW???
I have 7 papers to write and I already bought gas station ice cream in my pjs and questioned whether or not a beer float was a thing.
If tits could talk, mine would be bragging
I woke up and there was pizza slices on the fucking walls of my room
Despite popular belief cocaine is not a good pre-workout
My phone autocorrected "shhhhh" to "AHHHHHHHHH" and I feel like that says a lot about my life
I appreciate the fact that you sent me a snapchat of your dick soaking in a cup of water.
His junk had piercings everywhere. The dick and balls. It was a fucking pirate penis.
It’s easy for me to be professional, the tough part is finding the perfect amount of bitchy undertone
Mom got drunk as hell, crashed Dad's wedding and some how left with the best man. This is why you should be glad you aren't my sibling.
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