Last night we were drunk and talking about rude things, I mentioned felching and had to explain it to everyone. Everyone was disgusted and asked how I knew about such filth and I told them you told me. Don't get mad. Also a quck heads up, you might get gifts of straws at work,
Every time a guy reaches down to touch my vag, i feel really sorry for all the transgender girls who still have a penis there.
That's weird cause every time i feel a girls vag i feel way worse for all the guys who reached down there and got a penis.
i feel like even strangers are annoyed with me because of how drunk i was last night
so... my grandma just told me i should be a stripper
well at least shes not calling you fat anymore
They seriously just ended our alcohol presentation by giving us beer cozies. I love college.
Calling yourself a modern day Geisha doesn't justify being a whore.
the room spins SO much faster in panama
I already have one guy that I have regrettable sex with. I don't need another.
After seeing how much you are able to funnel in a night, I am 90% sure your blood is pure gin.
he was once again the drunkest girl at the party
Maybe her vagina is like a vacuum
I can't decide if that would be a good or bad thing. I'm leaning toward good
I just encountered the same creepy guy I showed you, he jumped inside the dumpster screaming.
I think i was just meant to be a stripper. A ballerina stripper cat
When I wake up, please remind me why my shoe is in the toilet, my shower is filled with jello, and there is a naked girl sleeping on my coffee table holding a bag of Cheetos. that is all.
I knew she was the one when we had sex to the halo soundtrack.
Randomize
