# days @ Coachella: 1 people i showed how to break it down: 279
My STD test came back clean. I'd like to thank all the guys I've slept with, they made this possible. I want to say thanks to all my friends, for believing in me living up to the full slut potential. And last but not least, I'd like to thank alcohol. I wouldn't be who I am today w/out you. I feel like I need to frame this...
Haha. We better find him. He looked like he came out of Switzerland's vagina, he's that much of a blonde beauty.
While he was going down his phone rang and he answered saying I'll call you later I'm eating.
If I die tonight. Just know that chicken I made fuckin ruled. Recipe: Chicken with a shitload oF spice
I think I suffocated him while I was riding his face
You know whats not fun? Making yourself throw up on a sand dune at 4 in the morning.
Under no circumstances is it ok to do naked cartwheels in front of anyone. i don't care how much ecstasy you took
We finally have the house to ourselves and your out playing Lance Fucking Armstrong
We decided it was acceptable to walk out of class on a quest for Doritos. That high.
He wouldn't let me put a red handprint on his face or scream to him everytime he walked away.
Why did you want to do any of that?
If someones last name is Wilson, you are obligated to pretend that you are Tom Hanks and they are a Volleyball and quote the movie when you speak to them.
Unintentional and slightly frustrating adventures are basically all I'm good for. Expect heart palpitations, cheap food, and homeless men serenading us.
And after peeing my pants waiting outside for him, i proceeded to drop down and roll in the nearest puddle to pretend like i just ate shit when he arrived
Signs of a stoner: trying everything in your fridge topped with peanut butter to seek satisfaction.
I watched one of the videos of you hanging from the rafters, and it is both violent and sexual in nature.
Randomize
