Yes, one should always join a cult. At least once.
I had a dream last night that I was the one that killed Biggie
I woke up 25 minutes ago and have been high for 20. Impressive?
I'm sitting in class drinking a forty out of a paper bag. No ones said anything yet. I think my professor is trying to ignore me. Better start yelling louder.
i just dedicated my kegstand to your breasts
Also I may have a condom stuck inside me, but I won`t know til I check the couch coushions.
It's just weird. It's like Big Bird dating Meg Griffin.
My liver was like a college freshman on spring break. It would've danced topless on tables if it could have.
I haven't even booked my flights yet and I have my drug supply sorted
We didn't have sex because he locked himself in the bathroom and passed out while he was taking a shit. I cuddled with his cat.
I asked if I could borrow some condoms. She referred to herself as "a soup kitchen for whores".
Do you think I shall pursue this journey to the center if the dick?
After the clumsiest day of my life I think it's safe to say my dream of being a ninja is dead. Memorial service with a glass of wine at 8pm
It's accurate though. I am legitimately passionate about pickles. I crave pickles the same way I crave sex. It is a deep rooted animalistic need
Is it disrespectful or patriotic to pole dance on an american flag pole?
Randomize
