We're pre-gaming then going to chuck e cheese's.
If you're joking I'm going to be sad
i think i have herpe
just one?
These 3 days between Christmas and new years when all the bosses are on vacation are essentially a competition to see who can do the least amount of work
My mother just asked me if i ever swallow the goods...should i be concerned?
The beer is more important than you right now.
The only comparison I have for the iPhone is that it's like youre constantly getting a blow job
So... i mean if they do have cameras in his apartment buildings pool room atleast we gave them a little show.
It's amazing the difference a day and 2000 mg of antibiotic make. Nine days to go.
Beware of calls from Dad. I just had a longer than I would care to admit convo about the ididarod. Apparently it starts tomorrow.
My number one goal in life is to find out who can fill a keg with Popov
They're putting plan B in vending machines now. My life just got so much easier.
It's a given that you're going to get peed on at a country concert
You wrote me a check. For zero dollars. For my soul. Dick.
I NEED A MOM FRIEND. NOW.
No we were too stoned to stop you from wiping the peanut butter all over the car.
Randomize
