Being 21 is my favorite hobby I'm really good at it
can i drink enough to forget this semester even happened?
i just opened a seperate checking account to keep track of how much i make and spend on our keggers
Tried to bribe the bartender with wedding cake. Felt bad for not giving her a tip.
He will. He has no choice. What's he gonna do? Find a better fuck buddy? We both know that's not possible. I'm the ideal friend with benefit. Minus snoring and uneven tits.
Can I bring some rope too? It's not too early for bondage talk, is it?
Can you come pick me up and take me to breakfast then the police station?
Where's your car?
The girl I brought home apparently stole it
he has to serve us drink and appetizers in his french maid costume for the Pirates game tonight. Bring everyone.
You kept chewing on the empty milk carton and saying "kitty" over and over again. It was an interesting night.
I had my first "Damn Kids/When I Was That Age" rant at work today. We need to drink this feeling out of me. NOW.
I swear, the guy behind me wasn't paying attention until the words "middle aged fuckboy" came out of my mouth.
they are cutting me off...little do they know I am making a 75 yr old man i named Herbert buy me drinks now...no shame at 11 am...
You can't just bring up bondage and then stop answering me
I don't know if it was the movie or the drugs but after i watched it i wore the same spongebob shirt to school for two weeks and stopped showering
You know how fear has a smell? Well turns out shame has a smell too. It's Pina colada flavored anal grease.
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