Her name starts with A and ends with whore.
9 am. shotgunning while conditioning my hair. i love college football season.
Do you think unemployment will give me a christmas bonus?
Remember when we were mad at her for brining her mom on spring break? She just won the wet t-shirt contest. I think we owe her an apology.
this guy is so high, he just ate half of a frozen blueberry muffin and half of a frozen poppyseed muffin, then proceeded to make a "hybrid poppyberry muffin"
And for some reason I was covered in ants... So your probably covered in ants as well
you called your neighbor "slutsauce" then passed out on the stairway. not even sure why, but props to you.
when we went to bed he asked me to hold his penis so he knew i was there for him
Would it be bad if I bought her bread, meat, cheese, and stuff as her christmas present so she can make me a sandwich?
We attempted to microwave fifteen corndogs in the microwave and may have ruined it. Also there were fake mustaches on all of his appliances...he said he doesn't like drunk me.
i am willing to donate my body to this science experiment when it means free blowjobs
It's a fucking menopause festival down here at the strike zone
Cool. I might be making a sickly but incredibly well dressed wine drunk appearance in a couple hours
I understand, but unless there is an intervention for me being planned, i DON NOT want to talk about my life choices
I don't know what she looks like but I'm pretty sure she has a pussy.
Randomize