Just spent the rest of my time at that bar trying to keep a probs underage closet gay from touching my kitten to prove he still likes girls.
How do you get a cum stain out of a trampoline?
Nothing says "You're all grown up now" like setting up your 401k with shitty underwear.
I've been drunk so often this summer being sober is exciting
did you seriously make the punch out of vodka and food coloring
just walk of shamed past a man riding a bike. RIDING A BIKE. what a wholesome life he must lead.
what the fuck is a social media consultant, who does she consult for, and how bad is she at it? her facebook account is currently hacked and posting ads for the ipad 2 on my newsfeed
Your French couch surfers have just started playing flip cup with old crow. Basically you need to come back here
I think it would be reallllly cool if you took your best friend to work so she doesnt have to have an awkward cab ride with the driver she drunkenly made out with last night ...
When you're not at your house I assumed you're somewhere having sex
A special kind of bond is formed between two people when they act as a pee shield for one another for drunken pisses in an alleyway
Your face; I've seen enough of it for today. Go away now please.
Is it too much to ask for 10 minutes of privacy while I masturbate?
may or may not have entered into a gay civil rights discussion with 6 year olds. Hint: I did.
Don't EVER mix a flaming shot, with a Jello shot.. As good as it sounds flaming Jello is not a good idea
Randomize
