that john and kate plus 8 dude has ruined asians for me
Having dinner with my dad, watching the news and some AIDS prevention ad comes on. My dad then kindly informs me that he doesn't enjoy the feel of condoms.
Buying $100 worth of beef jerkey sounded like a terrific idea last night.
walkin around the woods blazed, drawing pictures of trees and plants, i get a grade for this
well the hot one passed out so thats that, but then the fat one made chicken nuggets....totally worth it
Ps I don't think it counts as being open minded if you didn't know he was missing a leg until you had already started making out.
I made out with a bride-to-be last night at the bar. Jesus died for our sins right?
They conduct scientific research memoirs about what sort of shit happened last night after I ate those cookies.
If you call getting home safe by sprinting down Spanish Harlem barefoot still rolling then ya I made it
I think god invented us with two hands so we can grab an ass and spank it at the same time.
Seriously babe, why do I keep waking up with bruises on my nipples? WHAT ARE YOU DOING TO ME IN MY SLEEP?
Actually, scratch that, I'm not sure I want to know.
Hooked up with a guy that looked like Dean Thomas. Mediocre at best, but I stopped myself from calling him Dean in bed. So I got that going for me.
I need a life alert for his random dick pics. My heart can't handle that.
Worst sex ever! He was a talker for sure! I was on top and out of no where he said "Oh you bad bitch?" I stopped and left.
My alcoholism is old enough to drink.
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