We are so in love
so when's the next time you get to see your balls
week 6 of class: i have yet to go to spanish sober. i love being THAT girl.
Someone told me that drinking would get me no where in life. Drinking has gotten me everywhere in life.
you made pancakes with beer, you said they were good. then you threw up 15 minutes later
He had the Transformers symbol tattooed to his chest. We had to do it doggy style so I could laugh into my pillow instead of his face.
I mean can we take a second to high five on our sex life? I love us.
the man who designed bathrooms to have toilets within easy puking distance from the shower is my hero
The prostitute across the street from us is having a seizure on her front lawn again.
Carrying your underwear around in your purse on Sunday morning is its own religious experience
He literally chugged a bottle of wine in under 2 minutes. Stood up, said "fuck what ya heard" and stabbed the bottle into their drywall.
You and your vagina are hellbent on selfdestruction and bad decisions
Dude...can we put that on a tshirt? I will totally sport that shit.
Give me a reason to not spend the rest of my evening high watching dogs 101 videos
There is a guy in class using a wine bottle as a water bottle. Welcome to the Faculty of Environment.
You should know two things about me,,,1) I am highly sexual and 2) I am HIGHLY competitive so you telling me about how much sex you had with the other girl makes me say "challenge accepted"... you should hydrate.
Okay first of all, that is a sick ass nickname please call me that forever. Second, i need your help.
Randomize