the only thing i have to deal with now is the fact that i'm still wearing spandex shorts from last night
New boss looks like john cusack in a collar. Hot. Why do i always want to have sex with priests?
member when we used to take shits together before volleyball games?
Grab the Coors Light. Its time to get NASCAR drunk
I just saw that your im name has '4eva' in it. Your man card has been revoked.
In Canada she would be a 10 but here in America she's only a 7
Come on, video tape it. Take one for the team
Exactly how low is masturbating to your cute professor's lecture videos?
The only requirement is that his name is Kevin... All other factors don't matter to drunk me. Drunk me likey Kevins.
His mom always writes on my facebook right after we have sex. it's like she knows. with her scary mom psychic powers
Getting up is taking longer than anticipated. Alcoholic fish bowls have made getting out of bed a multitstep process.
I think it's gonna be hard to find a guy that won't take my consistent drinking as alcoholism
St. Patrick's day can kiss my ass. Still hungover. I guess I showed up at my gym blacked out yesterday morning. Like im not missing a gym day b
FUUUCK. sunburned vagina. this is the worst day ever. i'm not leaving my room until it peels.
no real plans this weekend. trying to derail the alcohol induced fucking hell train I've been riding for the past three weeks.
Randomize
