I have to tell you about my conversation with the cloud dragon!
i just dont know how to see an unattractive person as more than a friend
I mean i might have to drop this class tomorrow. I just walked into a midterm
I drank gravy. I actually drank gravy. This is heaven.
I woke up on the steps beside a plate of spaghetti and a toilet paper roll ripped in half. And i actually think this day is gonna get better.
Well, love is in the air. And by that I mean: it seriously smells like sex in here.
Apparently I walked up to him, mumbled something incoherently, then started to make out with him. Why does this always happen.
Just got attacked by a family of raccoons, I have the worst luck.
I got turned off after he said, "i can see us in the future...me, you, and a back yard full of alpacas."
They're either celebrating their tax money or trying to kill each other.
Just whatever you do, don't neglect the balls.
dude idk where I am. fuckin like. there wheat field and a horizon and shit. I think I got on a bus? some dude named Sam gave me a pamphlet about Jesus.
quit whining, rub some dirt on it, and lets get out there
its my penis
We should get drunk in walmart
when?
20 minutes ago
I can't believe the MLB is making the NHL look good.
Randomize
