they almost convinced me to put "Funbags" in the 'other names you may be known as' section of the job application
She walked into class late sat down for 5 min muttered 'oh i cant do this' and walked out. She looked like death.
We should party with her soon
So it looks like you may be an uncle real soon. Don't ask how I feel about it and don't text me back.
Kate gave me a 3 day old cup of tequila last night and forced me to chug it. P.s. i drew u a picture
This is irresponsible on your part, leaving me alone in a bar.
I asked you if you wanted to go to the ER, have me sew it up or just wrap it in duct tape and keep on keepin on. You just said YES. I remember very little after that.
You're a good friend.
Need your help. Dad's drunk and trying to build a still in the basement.
NM he's asleep in a pile of towels. They need to ease people back into Hockey Night in Canada.
We are going to the humane society and getting you microchipped so you don't get lost on your birthday. Either that or your getting a child leash
You kept trying to make people drink "salsa-ritas." But all you did was dump tequila in a half full jar of salsa, and shove it in people's faces while shouting at them.
You're officially the most high maintenance man I've ever had inside me.
To this day, I regret not having sex in the bathroom
But, if I start dating you brother, I can't talk to you about the sex anymore!! Like... Can we talk about it anonymously?! I just won't use his name.
Guess who just hooked up with a guy who was wearing a shirt from his mom's "dress up closet"?!
You are not the cause of late onset lesbianism.
New Orleans is just like you. Dirty but beautiful and will always have a special place in my heart
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