..Thats also how I think I got the lyrics from MIAs Paper Planes Sharpeed on my ass? Maybe.
Oh. Thats cool. Im not dating anyone right now. Sean gave me chlamydia from some GUY he fooled around with. Im being abstinent.
For using a life jacket as a pillow, I slept pretty good last night...
You don't have to be drunk! I've licked your asshole before
Ive been using palmolive to shower with for he last week, dont tell me about not having money. Im heading to the bar r u going.
Woke up laying in the kitchen floor with a cup in one hand and the beer tap in the other. Guess I just needed that one last beer.
Hm, finding a time when my drinking and your real life don't conflict could be difficult
Remember, ur body isn't a visitors center
Never thought I'd say this but the maple syrup flavored vodka probably wasn't our best idea
Cory and I accidentally had a sexual adventure last night.
How do you ACCIDENTALLY have a sexual adventure?
Jäger goes great with personal crises and receding morals...
I just walked out of the side door of the bar to come in the front door so no one would know I've been here drinking before our work meeting.
Don't worry my mom is buying me a vasectomy for Christmas
Egg rolls and cum. Not my worst snack.
Hitting up all my dealers for my birthday grams is paying off
Randomize
