I saw a chick at 8 am this morning walking back to my dorm wearing wings... I'm kind of jealous.
Tostitos Scoops as shot glasses. Eat for chaser.
It was awful until we put her on a word ration. And she rationed her words accordingly. I love blondes.
Is it love? I honestly haven't even thought about watching porn for over a week now, and haven't thought about fucking any strangers either. It's quite eerie.
He has pizza coupons and a hammer next to his toilet.
At some point i could of swore that you were in my bedroom riding a manatee last night..... I like my new dealer
Peeling duct tape off of my dick is definitely one of the stranger sensations that I've experienced.
Two questions. One. Where are you watching election results tomorrow? Two. Can we have Obama victory sex?
next time we make out at a concert please try to refrain from screaming out our hotel room number.. the amount of guys that knocked on our door after you passed out was ridiculous
It's like weed even makes my glasses better. Everything is so bright and clear and beautiful!
If I hid at school to avoid the cops, is it fleeing and evading or just being a good student?
I try not to have friends with attractive fathers, it only brings my morals down.
First day back to class and I have already pulled out the hard liquor
Congrats! Its a fuck boy!
ALL I WANT IS SEMEN IN/ON/AROUND MY BODY. WHY IS HE MAKING THIS SO HARD.
Randomize