Just saw a policeman use his lights to go through a red light only to turn them off and go to Sonic...
sometimes i just want to live alone. my roommate keeps looking at me weird like hes never seen a girl eat plain salt before
So my mom just called me into her room and showed me a condom wrapper she found in my room. "Oh that's from when I was like 16." I don't think that was very comforting.
I just overhead some girl saying that she's trying out for the real world so she has a backup if she doesn't get into teach for america...
I pretty much gave up on you when you told me you couldn't go home yet b/c you had to stop at church first. It was 2 AM and you insisted you were late for mass.
she just gave her compliments to the chief, at dennys
There are huge fuckin pieces of palm tree in the road. what a road hazard. as i sit here and text you as i swerve to miss them
Girl walking by was talking on the phone about how he needed to write a gratitude list in her letter to god this week. Too stoned
There are flashing lights and a man dressed as Santa with a bullhorn in my cul de sac.
I'm not sure if this is awesome or scary.
I just mistook cooking oil for the whiskey that was also on the counter... They're the same colour. That was not a good shot... I need to not drink alone.
State dependent memory. I just needed to feel my teeth. It was like a fog was lifted.
You know you can't live off of vodka and pizza rolls forever
I'VE ALREADY MADE MY CHOICE
The way I kissed her was actually pretty charming and then it devolved to car sex
I told you I missed you and you said you missed me as much as you miss a urinary tract infection. I get it. You're still mad.
We banged in my car doggy style with my head out the window. The sky was marvelous and I saw a shooting star. Its destiny; we're meant to fuck forever.
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