so high. i feel like my whole body is a boner
Take your time, they're doing body shots off the dog.
Passing out during sex is actually quite pleasant. its like being rocked to sleep with a penis
They only knew me as the lesbian that passed out in a bathtub. That's not what you call friendship.
My liver hurts and I just woke up from my first sleep in two days
Sounds like the perfect vacation
Second wind. Either that or my heart is about to explode. I'm hoping the first one.
I was having the most awesome dream about onion rings and you hit me and told me to stop touching you...WTF?
Apparently coming home smelling like I took a bath in beer is frowned upon in this household. I'm so glad I don't actually live here.
It's a whole movie about Joseph Gordon-Levitt watching porn and having sex... I NEED to own it..
All I'm saying is the next time I see him naked, there better be something in it for me that doesn't end in bailing him out of jail.
Stripping out of my teacher clothes to Talk Dirty to Me. Who let me become a teacher?
I'm stuck in a tree and request your assistance ASAP
He told me he was cooking me a special dinner tonight. His "five star meal" was popcorn in champagne glasses, and chic fil a sauce in jello shot containers to dip the popcorn in. He still tries to convince me he doesn't smoke weed anymore.
I told you that we shouldn't have sex. You said "its okay I already saw you pee" apparently that was convincing
i just cleaned my bong... I do not feel healthy
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