remember when u banged some random dude twice in the back restaurant room of the bar i work at with customers still there? and woke up with an enormous highschool-sized hickey this morning? no big deal.
She announced her abortion via fbk
Just saw an Asian guy riding his razor scooter to class. Dreams do come true
He told me to pick a safe word. I said 'cactus' and he said I wasn't taking this seriously and that I wasn't cut out for s&m.
Atty had lunch with DA and confirmed I am not the target of the investigation. No word on anything else
So I've gone into the break room to heat up a styrofoam cup 8 times over the course of 4 hours.. that desperate to see him. Now I have a broken heart AND cancer.
Just remember, if we get caught, you're deaf and I don't speak English.
Would it be inappropriate to trade Christmas cookies for sex?
I feel you. We can get adjoining rooms. It'll be like Disney world, but with drugs and ivs instead of roller coasters and Mickey Mouse.
Which is way cooler
Trying to do the walk of shame over here WHY are there a hundred ppl on the el?! Thank god I pulled a summit and wore casual clothes I even stopped by the farmers market and bought some squash
Just cropdusted a little kid that wouldn't get out of my way in Kroger. Welcome to the real world bitch.
If it makes u feel any better my dick feels pretty tender dude
he's smothering me... and not in the good, can you move your thigh off my face please?.. way
Dude did you see that video of yourself crying while bathing in vodka on YouTube?
Some bitch is passed out in a pool of vomit. Fucking lightweight, it's only 8.30.
Oh, wait.. That's you.
Randomize
