i just want to meat her and do terribly wonderful things to her vagina...
S and I had anal without a condom because I'm on my rag but he didn't finish. Should I still take Plan B?
And we hooked up in the carwash. I told you our creative juices were flowing today.
I guess you don't remember pouring tequila in the dog bowl and slurping it.
I feel like I'm in a bed a bagels and mistakes.
I gained confidence after I found out she was a lesbian. At least that way I could flirt with her and convince her to buy me taco bell after the bar
I feel like I've been drunk all of June. And I am in NO WAY ashamed about it.
He had to stop fucking her halfway through to do a shit. When he returned she was still waiting for him. The joys of MDMA
She sat on the stairs and yelled sex positions at us. I don't remember if we went along with it but judging by the beer and condoms I'm thinking yes.
You were sitting in the tub, clothed, squirting my KY all over yourself. You said "it's warm." then passed out.
I'm stealing this baby.
Well I always support illegal activity but where would you put it?
You are so lucky you didn't go back to Tate's house. They decided to figure out who had the biggest balls... I was the judge
We decided to keep having sex while I ordered the pizza. I wanted extra pepperoooooooooooooni.
A hefty woman and I mean hefty shoved her number in my pocket at the gym without as much as a hello, winked and kept walking. Going to use your bed to defile her, don't want her to know where I live or have my neighbors see! Thanks, you're a pal!
the cop found his r2d2 bong and asked me if i ever smoked out of him. i'm like, no sir. he's like ahh. if i were to smoke, it'd definitely be out of some star wars character.
easily made my night.
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