belinda wants 2 know wr u got ur butt pads
i dont wear butt pads that thang is au naturel
Yeah...right...LMAO
How do u get a lost condom out? Like really lost... up there...
shes about as inviting as chlamydia
Bisexual people are plain selfish.
Last night drunk me texted a sure to be hungover me my class schedule and locations for today. I'm like a mom preparing her child for the first day of school
He just helps fat girls get exercise. One walk of shame at a time.
My TA just asked me why I was late to class. How do I say because I was having the best orgasm of my life in Arabic?
It was so weird. I had like an out of body experience. I heard the moaning, but I didn't know it was me.
got high to the hills theme song. FEEL THE RAIN ON YOUR SKIN. no regrets.
All you kept saying was, " Barack fucking Obama. FUCK Michelle" and then you motorboated me.
Watching the wiggles while tripping on acid is the scariest fucking thing of all time
Just got biofeeze on my vag. Weirdest sensation everrr. Can't decide if I want to cum or cry
I can tell right now that knowing you will either be really fun or ruin my life
when part of the plan includes getting high, i usually forget how the rest of the plan goes.
He was actually surprised when I poured myself a glass full of straight vodka. Clearly he doesn't know me as well as he thinks.
Randomize
